A close friend, who was recently engaged, asked me to be a bridesmaid in her wedding on Monday! I am excited and honored she chose me to stand with her as she marries her best friend. After we were over the initial excitement of her asking, and me saying yes, she mentioned she was having trouble finalizing the rest of the bridal party. I began to think about the many aspects that go into picking bridesmaids. It’s not always a no-brainer! Here are a few tips:
Pick a number
The first step in choosing your bridesmaids is determining how many people you would like to have in the bridal party. This is something that should be discussed with your fiancé as typically you have an equal number of bridesmaids and groomsmen. You may also want to take into consideration the number of guests you plan to have. Traditionally, a groomsman will also usher in guests. The rule of thumb is one usher [groomsman] for every 50 guests and therefore an equal number of bridesmaids.
You may feel closer to your girlfriends than your sister or sister-in-law, but they are family. This day is about bringing two families together. Asking these family members to be in your wedding may mean more than you know. Plus, the last thing you need in preparation for the big day is family drama.
It’s your day
Don’t get caught up in the opinions of others. When picking bridesmaids, remember it’s your decision to choose who you would like to stand with you on that special day! It’s important to remember you do not need to ask every person to be in your wedding that had you in theirs. There are plenty of other roles friends can be involved in including readings, special music selection performance or acting as your personal attendant.
Far away friends
When asking friends who live out of state, or even out of the country to be in your wedding, anticipate that they won’t be extremely involved in the process. In fact, they may only be around for the wedding weekend. If moral support is all you need from your maids, this works, but if you expect much more, you may consider giving them another role in your big day.
Don’t take it back
Never, ever, take back the invitation once you’ve asked someone to be in your wedding. Not only is this tasteless, but it can also cause hurt feelings. If you asked a friend to be in your wedding to begin with, you obviously consider her a friend. You don’t want to ruin a friendship or make for an awkward situation on your wedding day.
What factors did you consider in choosing your bridesmaids?